


Reflections

by KumoriYami



Category: Metal Gear
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angst, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-14
Updated: 2018-03-14
Packaged: 2019-03-18 12:57:12
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,493
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13682142
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KumoriYami/pseuds/KumoriYami
Summary: Final reflections of a sniper





	Reflections

**Author's Note:**

> if it's not obvious, im an extreme newbie to the MG franchise so I might interpret some things differently. sorry?  
> anyway, as usual, i don't own anything though I admit I borrowed some ideas that came from the novelization of TPP and was partly inspired by this comic (http://i1.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/001/016/722/02a.jpg) for this story.
> 
> ....I have a different take on Quiet in this story that I hope's okay.

_Venom Snake was dead. Killed by Solid Snake, arguably an assassin sent by a man who he trusted - Big Boss._

There were no words to describe what she was feeling as her mind processed that same message again and again. Not the Boss -  _her_ Boss... but the Big Boss had been the one responsible. She wasn't sure if she was feeling rage or sorrow after having translated the transmission she received from Code Talker. Part of her was curious why he had sent her a message on a frequency she had only conveyed to him in passing, though she did acknowledge that aside from V, he was the only other person in Diamond Dogs who hadn't truly adopted a vigilant attitude against her so she could trust his words to some degree. The fact that Mother Base had now been destroyed allowed Code Talker to send the transmission in the first place as it meant that it was monitoring of what was left of Diamond Dog's communications had significantly decreased. Still, the Diné's transmission clearly stated that he had sent such a message for his own sake given how it was true that no one in the world could find her if she truly wished it, and the overall uncertainty of her own survival given his understanding of parasites. 

Rage was a hell of an anesthetic, and relying on her desire for revenge had certainly helped her get through the worst of the pain and withdrawals from the lack of sunlight and water in Afghanistan after saving the Boss' life, not to mention the days and weeks after, but she unfortunately knew how to cling to life better than she had liked. Struggling to survive while at the same time ensuring that she did not encounter anyone she could risk infecting with the English strain of parasites she still carried meant that she was killing and stealing more than she'd like but such was the necessity of adaptation. Adapt or die. Such a universal truth was unfortunately never truer as her body and its symbiotic parasites fought against the English strain vocal chord parasites inside her every day, keeping her in a constant state of varying degrees of internal pain as she knew that her body was recovering and being attacked at the same time... though it the effects were milder on days with less sun when she then had to rely more on hydrating her One that Covers parasites and body to alleviate what she was experiencing. Still, it didn't feel as bad as being set aflame when she could feel things like a somewhat normal person, and she had already to decided that she would stop feeling if it became too much.

That original order that got her entangled in this mess, and had given birth to Quiet was in a baptism of flame, had been to kill the man thought to be Big Boss.... and while the legendary soldier's subterfuge likely wasn't taken into account when she was sent after his recovering duplicate or in the reiteration of the order to have the body-double killed years later, Skull Face and XFO were none the wiser, but she did not care. She did not care about who her target was aside from if it was the person she was ordered to kill, and the information concerning their skill sets. Even with what happened when she saw him again... she would not offer her thoughts on the man perceived to be the target, regardless if he was not the intended target. 

No, she was simply a tool. A weapon to point and shoot. She had thrown everything about her away for her revenge, and in exchange she had become a tool that was destined to be exploited by others. A pawn that only moved on the orders of its superiors. She would never be a person to voice doubts when the order was given. While she hadn't regretted her decision to trade in her future for the skills she now possessed, she did feel.... disheartened at the realization that she lacked emotional development because of it, which was why she still wasn't sure if she should be angry at the people who accepted what had been done to V and did nothing, the man's loyalty to true Big Boss or he who was now departed. 

It was odd to know that it was only because she had thrown everything away that she did not know how to process such... a revelation or emotion. It would be lying to say that part of her didn't want to kill Big Boss, Solid Snake, and Ocelot for the roles they played in what happened to V, but she knew that it would likely not be what  _he_ wanted. Big Boss was the man who he literally died for... Ocelot had been a trusted friend and confidant to the man, while Solid Snake.... Solid Snake was likely trying to kill Big Boss while being used as Big Boss' tool to realize his dream... Venom's dream. Still... it was downright sad to acknowledge that that the only person she didn't really want to kill was Kazuhira... as she did not believe that he would ever have agreed with everything done to V, much less engineer the man's death given her views and impression on him. No, he most certainly not have gone along with such a orchestration without his own anger and doubts given his own background and experiences. 

If she could sigh, Quiet would, knowing what she knew now. She was similar to V in the fact that they were used by others, but unlike her, he was a man who had been willing enough to become another person, a friend, all due to his loyalty and beliefs... but was more than a weapon that existed to further Big Boss' ambitions as they were his own. It might have been the reason why she was fascinated by him in the first place as he had an existence so unlike her, with completely opposite experiences. It would be too cruel to call him a tool, as it was true that V had been the stand in who built an organization around him, earned the respect and loyalty of the men and women around him and somehow managed to coax back real feelings into her. At the time, she hadn't even understood it herself, only realizing that something had made it so she didn't carry out Skull Face's plan to destroy V and Mother Base... In hindsight if she had carried out those orders it might have been conceivable that Diamond Dogs wouldn't have been perceived as such a dangerous entity and V might still be alive, but it was only a hypothetical scenario that felt more like wistful thinking.

It was only because of V now Quiet found she could not discard everything as she had done so before... all because of an emotional pain she did not know how to deal with. Before meeting him, she could cast aside everything and anything for her revenge. Her future... her relationships... her emotions... and even her pain, all in the pursuit of revenge and in order to maintain herself a weapon. A new day simply meant dedicating every iota of her being into a mission to carry out or a target to eliminate, regardless if that brought her pain or even death. It was a simple world she lived in, with no illusions about who and what she was with the only information that she needed was knowing who to shoot whomever her handler identified as an enemy that Venom Snake had ultimately shattered whether he knew it or not. It was ironic.... what transpired between them. She had saved him from a snake's venom, but he had poisoned her heart and mind. It had been most evident when she had leapt into the vat of chlorine disinfectant to retrieve Shibani's necklace. The notion of family and keepsakes had been a distant memory before she went to Mother Base, but seeing those children reminded her of a time that she had long forgotten... only because she knew V would have done such a thing if he was able to. 

After that incident, she was admittedly surprised to hear of the Boss' reaction from Ocelot to what she did while recovering, though her actions also earned her a light reprimanding from him, basically saying that she had to take better care of herself and to not take actions that would adversely affect V since he cared about her well-being. It was no secret that in their line of work, death typically came sooner than later, but it was... strange yet not unwanted to hear that someone was actually worried for well-being. It... had likely been around that time she remembered how much love could hurt oneself, though unlike the time it destroyed her, had been what kept her soul from falling into the darkness that haunted her past. Still she would not deny that being near him made Quiet feel as if her phantoms were simply nightmares from long ago.

As Quiet sat beneath the sun in near a patch of wildflowers by a small lake, she knew... deep down... he cared, just as had she dared to. It wouldn't be wrong to say that she feared to let anyone get close to her lest those those ties strangle her, just as it could even be argued as V's loyalty could have been his own undoing in a way as he was killed by someone that had been sent by the man he trusted the most. Regardless, it was also true that being with the Diamond Dogs had brought her a sense of familiarity and respect despite the obvious fear and disdain they held towards her. 

She smiled sadly as she watched the flowers dance in the wind, seemingly motionless for hours as she sat in silence, enjoying the scenery around her. The ability of admiring the beauty that the world had to offer was one of the very few luxuries she had managed to keep from before her revenge. A revenge which she found that she could put down now. There would be no more deaths from her. Not Ocelot, not Solid Snake, not Big Boss. None save the parasites she hid from the world. She owed V and the Diamond Dogs that much. 

What had they said again when they were infected with parasites...? 

_"We live and die by your order, boss."_

Quiet smiled as she took in the last sight of the sun as she recalled the memory and contemplated those final words. Even in death, those soldiers had been Diamond Dogs... and even in death, they did not turn away from the knowledge of the consequences to keep the world safe. She had slipped the diamond she carried next to Venom's when she had left, but now.... now she truly felt like she had the right to stand alongside them. There was only one way to remove the English strain vocal parasites in the world...only one way she could truly be free from the pain she was feeling...  only one to unburden herself from what she was feeling. Perhaps there was one way she could see him again him...

Such a thought goes through her head as she doused herself in kerosene, stolen from some sort of mercenary encampment that she had killed her way through. Despite how her body was slowly suffocating, she feels... like she going cry as she's overwhelmed by the feeling of butterflies fluttering in her chest when she pulls out a familiar lighter that she had taken from V the last time she had seen him... rather the last time he could ever seen him. It felt rather appropriate knowing that the life she had led as Quiet started through a trial of fire and it would end in the same circumstance - in a pyre set alight by the memento she had of the man who had stolen away her heart who also reminded her that she was in fact a human being...

Flicking the lighter open, Quiet finds herself oddly at peace as she holds it over her heart after after lighting a slow flame by her feet, doing her best to take in the last sight of beauty with her.

* * *

  _Elsewhere?_

"Quiet." The voice that calls her is soft and gentle, but there's a familiarity in it that she can't deny as she turns around.

Venom! She knows genuine joy is on her face when she sees him, awkward as her expression may be. Everything about him was familiar though he looked a bit more tired than usual, but she didn't care what was going on if it meant seeing him again. Her feet move faster than she thinks, but she abruptly stops at an arm's length away from him once she realizes what she's doing. Did she even deserve to see him again? And with knowing of the conflict her departure must have caused? In the first place, she had been the one to let go...

Seeing her hesitation, V tentatively stretches his hands out to her, with his own movements mirroring her own nervousness as she stutters. "I... I had to leave. I'm-" 

He shook his head as he pushed a finger to her lip. 

_"Shh."_

The very idea that he was telling  _her_   to be quiet fills her with slight indignation, but she can't help but let out a small laugh. "...Really?"

"You don't need to explain yourself. It's okay. I understand." While V's expression was neutral, she could see the genuine acceptance for her in his eyes. He was also like her in the sense that he did not easily show his emotions, and understand without the usage of words. As he pulls her close, she finds an odd feeling of bashfulness and courage in his arms as she knew V was undoubtedly feeling embarrassed. "Just... don't do that again."

When they part, she can see obvious earnestness in his eye, and he had taken the initiative to grab her hand. While she was hardly eloquent with words, Quiet couldn't help but think it was truly... adorable to see V like this. "Mhm." 

They stand, divided by silence with their hands together for what feels like a significant amount of time, though Quiet doesn't mind. Neither of them are masters of conversation, and she truly felt euphoric with just what they were doing. Even something as simple as this was truly meaningful for her.

"Quiet, I..." Between the two of them, V was undoubtedly going to be the first to speak first. "Are you... are you willing to stay with me?"

She nods, she would always have his back. The very idea makes Quiet certain that her cheeks are red if that was even possible for her anymore as she whispers softly. _"Yes."_

**Author's Note:**

> edited on mobile. will edit again when i'm at a computer. meant to post this a lot earlier but life well... happened.


End file.
